December 2008
87 posts
My house smells like a mix of brownies and sauteed garlic and onions, which is surprisingly a really fantastic sensation. Therefore:
Good thing about New Year’s #1: My house smells most delicious and delicious things are to come (into my mouth).
^^That’s what she said.
I don’t even like New Year’s very much at all, yet I still always feel this shallow social pressure to do something “fun”, or something. It’s not really even something so exciting to celebrate. The only significance it really has is having to remember to change the year you write down when you date things. The shitty thing is I know if I don’t go out...
“You know, I’m against affirmative action and that includes affirmative...”
– Bernard Goldberg on Caroline Kennedy
SO FUCKING ON POINT!!
Watch
VLAD and EVERYONE - thank you so much- i am really...
cardinalcave:
VLAD SAID
“drink lotsa water..you gotta flush all those toxins out. and don’t worry about how you’re feeling..that makes it worse. Watch ROTJ and meditate on that sad wheezing sound Darth makes when he’s dying..smokers lungs! you don’t want that man.”
HEY VLAD WHAT IS ROTJ?
also thank you for this thanks everyonhe really this is super fucking intense and super fucking hard wow
...
If I were Bill O’Reilly I would call Caroline Kennedy a pinhead and not a patriot because she is being such a Kennedy and that is pinheaded.
Word vomit is actually not so terrible a thing because it gets it all out. It would be cool if it were actually that easy as to be able to spill it all out instead of feeling pure fucking “I want to fucking break you”-feeling rising in your stomach. Do you think Perez Hilton feels better drawing splooge puddles on peoples faces and in their eyes? Maybe that’s his form of...
“I was working on the proof of one of my poems all the morning, and took out a...”
– Oscar Wilde
Even though I don’t say anything valuable on here it still makes me feel kind of good. Sharing links and pictures and shit with no one in particular except my head feels nice. Tumblinnnnnnnn away
You Ain't No Picasso →
I will fucking personally break that fucker’s fucking face, mark my words. MARK MY WORDS.
I feel the need to clarify that I do indeed think I am uproariously funny.
Allison: Hey man, sorry I forgot to call you on your birthday yesterday! I really feel bad about it.
Dawson: Oh, man! I'm so sorry. I completely forgot. That is so not my thing. Happy birthday, you know if I would have remembered I would have called.
(several minutes pass)
Dawson: So were you glad I didn't call you on your birthday so you would get the opportunity to say that? I detected too much glee in your voice.
Truthfully, I had been planning on saying that for several weeks now.
I love my friends and had a great time with them tonight. With that being said, my DRA dreams from last night were all I could think about all day and all night.
I’m seeing Valkyrie on my birthday as per my own request. Call me crazy. I’ll probably respond.
My Christmas Gift To You!
If “Cats” met “Rainman” he would be the star.
zmoskow:
Juney I am so well-dressed today. You would totally blog my outfit.
In response to below, were people getting on you for your blog being harsh? I don’t think it is. I quite like it and seeing as I speak to you every 12 seconds anyway, it has to be pretty enjoyable for me to read your blog. Also, you told me that the Ferdman likes to just lay there and take it, so you trying to condition him would obviously not work. He knows that if you’re doing...
Hey, do you know who is a great actor? Nicholas Cage. Everyone’s always ragging on him for being hairy and old and Italian, but he does happen to be exceptionally badass. I’m watching Adaptation right now. Spike Jonze is a pretentious twat. He’s so full of shit. I wonder if he makes movies like this intentionally just to see if people will actually call him talented and he...
Two things:
1) Zach, I really like your blog. I post stupid links with pithy comments and I don’t think it is a waste of time. Take it back! Also, I was never lucky enough to experience your brother’s bed. I feel left out.
2) Do you remember that evil Cabbage Patch kid? It looked really cool on the commercials because it came with vegetables—that you would FEED...
If it’s decorum you don’t want, then decorum you won’t get.
Remember, Jessica, you asked for this. Get ready.
America's Least Qualified Senators - The Daily... →
Ok, Benjamin Sarlin. You know what, you dumb shit? These people RAN FOR OFFICE. They had to RUN FOR OFFICE, not sit back and go “Wah my daddy was president when I was 4 years old” and have Senate handed to them. Also, your description of political experience is completely innaccurate for a lot of them. Hope Tina Brown lays you off!
Best Wishes,
AS
I was walking on 35th Street today and heard these men talking behind me. I didn’t understand what they were saying and I was trying to figure out what language they were speaking when it hit me.
They were speaking English. Those were just their Scottish accents.
Uh oh.
Comparisons: The Bernie Madoff Case Is Basically... →
Awful. True.
Johnny Cash - Personal Jesus
Badass.
I really love strong eyebrows like Hilary Rhoda has, mostly because I love Hilary Rhoda, but also because I love eyebrows. Also, I am strong. Before growing out what could potentially be a forehead beard, I want to see what I would look like with strong eyebrows. With MS Paint.
It would be sweet to have a cool name anagram like Mr Mojo Risin. I made one for you Jess, and it’s SO COOL. Look:
Zorro
Actually that’s only using a few letters from your last name, but still. My name is too semitic for anything fun like that.
In the least creepy way possible, Dexter makes me want to be just like him! He is such a superhero. He is so much more super than Superman or Aquaman. Was Aquaman really ever supposed to be intimidating to villains? He looks like the star of Elton John—The Aquarium Show or something, with his scaley stupid leotard. I was wondering why Batman has never stabbed anyone in the face with one...
The Giants are breaking my face. They are so offense-challenged the past few weeks. It’s definitely not even just the Plaxico loss, which is meh-inducing enough even if they would NOT be sucking. Which they are. They are sucking. I mean, I could play better football than this for Christ’s sake, and I’m slow and can’t throw or catch. Oh my god, I’m watching right...
“Dynasty is not un-American, even if it is anti-democratic.”
– Senator Daughter - The Daily Beast
Ahmed Shihab-Eldin: Beirut: Jimmy Carter Urges... →
Because it worked so well when Carter pushed for Mideast peace the first time around.
A year ago tonight I went to see RRRRRIIIIIIICCCCCEEEEEEEE (a.k.a. Vincent Gallo Loves Himself) with Alex and it was such an incredible night for me. Not in that anything incredible happened, aside from the Michael Pitt Incident, but it was just one of those nights that you go to bed and really feel satisfied. It was also unwittingly the start of something really difficult for me to deal with. I...
Kelly got a le smoking at the YSL sale at Housing Works last night. If this doesn’t mean anything to you, allow me to congratulate you on living a life of purpose and meaning. June, Kelly, and I were there for almost 3 hours, far longer than anyone else, because I am fairly certain that everything we need to survive was in that one room—wine, cheese, gays, and vintage.